K'nuckles: Flapjack. Hey, Flapjack.
Come with me! We'll go and see
a place called Candied Island!
Bubbie: ♪ Who needs Candied Island? ♪
♪ It's safer at the docks ♪
K'nuckles: ♪ But there ain't no streams of sodie pop ♪
♪ to go drippin' down the rocks ♪
Bubbie: ♪ It's dangerous and risky ♪
K'nuckles: ♪ But adventurous and free ♪
Flapjack: ♪ Adventure, that's the life for me ♪
K'nuckles: ♪ There's lollipop trees and a lemonade sea! ♪
Bubbie: Doesn't sound very good to me.
♪ The misadventures of... ♪
Flapjack: ♪ Flapjack ♪
[ SPLASH ]
Flapjack: Wow!
K'nuckles: Where's my picture?!
I'm a way better adventurer
than any of these beefcakes.
You don't actually think this is
what adventurers are supposed to look like, do ya?
Flapjack: Well, they do have pretty big arms.
K'nuckles: Well, of course they got big arms!
All they do all day is run around pumping iron
and combing their hair!
No, Flapjack, that's not an adventurer.
Besides, I can do 20 push-ups a minute and get that buff.
I just don't want to rip my jacket.
Flapjack: Really?
K'nuckles: Of course!
Now, come on, I'll show you
how a real adventurer
gets his portrait painted.
[ DOOR OPENS ]
Flapjack!
It takes many years to master the art of painting.
But I think I could honestly say
that this is the best painting
I've ever done in my life. Huh!
K'nuckles: Really?
Oh, yes.
It looks exactly like you.
K'nuckles: [ GRUNTING ]
Come down. Come down.
The painting is finished.
Madam, may I present to you
my newest masterpiece...
"Mother with child."
[ DING! ]
K'nuckles: Is this some kind of joke?!
No joke. This is you.
Flapjack: Pretty good, huh, Cap'n?
K'nuckles: No!
Not pretty good!
I don't look like that!
This is what I look like,
and -- hey, fatty, move it.
I need to use the mirror -- huh?
[ CREAK! ]
[ SQUISH! ]
Hey, what are you doing?
Ooh, it fits perfectly on this wall.
K'nuckles: What?! What wall?!
The wall dedicated to
expectant mothers.
K'nuckles: What?!
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
[ DING! ]
I'm not pregnant!
Wait, you should be proud to be 10 months pregnant
with triplets!
Who's 10 months pregnant with triplets?
That fat, ugly lady with...
triplets!
Good for her.
K'nuckles: Come on!
Flapjack: What are you looking for, Cap'n?
K'nuckles: My diet maple syrup.
There's only one way to lose all this weight --
exercise and healthy eating.
Flapjack: How long will it take?
K'nuckles: A real adventurer like me --
I'll be back to normal in a week.
[ GLUG! GLUG! GLUG! ]
Flapjack: Wow! When do we start?
K'nuckles: Tomorrow.
All good workout routines start in the morning.
[ SNORING ]
Here's what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna run up and down those stairs
until my body gives out.
And then I'll rest while my muscles rebuild.
And when I wake up,
I'll do it again.
[ DRUMROLL ]
[ SPLASH! ]
Flapjack: K'nuckles!
K'nuckles!
There you are. What happened?
I thought we were gonna run upstairs.
K'nuckles: Huh? Oh, yeah.
I'm not gonna do that anymore.
Flapjack: How many of those maple syrups have you had?
K'nuckles: Eight. But they're diet.
There are way less "Camomies" in a diet maple.
Flapjack: What are "Camomies"?
K'nuckles: It's diet stuff! You wouldn't understand.
But trust me, just lifting this bottle to drink
it burns the same amount of "Camelbees"
as running up all them stairs.
Flapjack: Hey, that's a great idea!
Why do you just run up those stairs?
K'nuckles: I'm not gonna do that anymore.
Flapjack: But what about being back to normal in a week?
K'nuckles: Eh.
Flapjack: Aw!
[ KNOCKING ]
Who could that be?
K'nuckles: Oh, I don't know.
But after you make 'em leave,
can you get me another diet maple?
This weight isn't gonna lose itself.
Flapjack: Hello?
Hubba-wha?!
♪ A real adventurer! ♪
Hey.
Flapjack: C-c-can I help you?
Yes, I was at the portrait painters
picking up some of my adventure glamour shots
when I saw this painting.
Both: Huh?
This is the most beautiful
pregnant woman I've ever seen.
And I must meet her.
Bubbie: [ SNICKERING ]
What? What's so funny?
Is my love here or not?
I must speak with her.
Bubbie: [ SNICKERING ]
Flapjack: Um...K'nuckles isn't pregnant.
[ GASPS ]
Flapjack: And he's a man.
[ GASPS ]
N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]
Please, accept my apologies.
My therapist says that I fall in love too fast.
And I-I suppose she was right.
I'm sorry for wasting your time.
- Bubbie: Wait! - Hmm?
Bubbie: Would you like to stay for dinner?
I don't know.
I wouldn't want to bore you
with my many tales of adventure.
Bubbie: Oh, I insist.
We just love adventure stories,
don't we, pud'n?
Flapjack: Yep!
Well, I suppose I could stay.
But on one condition.
Both: What?
that I be allowed to hunt
and wrestle our meals.
Flapjack: Whoa!
[ BOTH LAUGHING ]
So, then what did you do?
Well, I did the only thing I could do.
I said, "Sorry, guy,
I didn't know that was your horse."
And then I wrestled him, too!
[ BOTH LAUGHING MANICALLY ]
Bubbie: [ GIGGLES ]
[ LAUGHTER STOPS ]
K'nuckles: Huh? Hmm? Hmm.
Mm-hmm. Hmm.
Where are my manners?
Here I am monopolizing the conversation,
and I forgot to see if that guy on the couch
had any stories.
K'nuckles: I got a story for you, you --
Flapjack: His name's Captain K'nuckles,
and he's the greatest adventurer ever!
He can even do 20 push-ups!
He just won't 'cause he doesn't want to rip his jacket!
Right, Cap'n?
K'nuckles: [ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]
20? How about 200?
[ WHOOSH! ]
You know, some say the only jacket a true adventurer needs
is his own muscles.
Flapjack: Ooh!
K'nuckles: [ GRUNTING ]
[ CREAK! ]
[ CRACK! ]
Want to get out of here?
K'nuckles: [ GASPING ]
- Flapjack: K'nuckles? - K'nuckles: [ GRUNTS ANGRILY ]
Flapjack: Real adventurer invited me
on an adventure, and i wanted to make sure
it's okay with you.
K'nuckles: I don't care.
Do whatever you want.
Flapjack: Are you sure?
K'nuckles: Yes!
Flapjack, you coming?
[ DOINK! ]
[ WARBLE! ]
K'nuckles: Flap, wait! Hey!
[ HORSE NEIGHING ]
Bubbie: Well, you really blew it this time.
K'nuckles: He's not hanging out with you either!
Bubbie: I know he isn't!
You think I don't know I'm stuck in this ocean
and can't get up on the docks with my baby?!
But you...
you can go anywhere you want with him.
But instead, you just lay around drinking maple syrup,
being all kinds of lazy!
It's no wonder he ran off like he did.
Can't even do a push-up.
Even I can do a push-up, and I'm a whale!
K'nuckles: You're right.
Bubbie: What are you doing?
K'nuckles: I'm gonna use this lazy butt
to lose some weight!
And win Flapjack back.
Hold my feet so I can do some sit-ups, will ya?
Bubbie: Hey, K'nuckles?
K'nuckles: What?
Bubbie: I'm proud of you.
K'nuckles: Just hold my legs down.
[ GRUNTING ]
[ CREAK! ]
Bubbie: Come on! Come on!
K'nuckles: Aah, nuts to this!
I'm just gonna go spy on them!
[ RATTLING ]
Bubbie: What are you doing now?
K'nuckles: Well, I can't let 'em know
I'm spying on them, can I?
Besides, I don't want everyone in Stormalong
telling me I'm pregnant.
You're pregnant?
K'nuckles: No!
Aw.
♪ Ho! ♪
[ WHIP CRACKS ]
[ HORSE NEIGHS ]
Ah-whoo-hoo-hoo!
Flapjack: [ LAUGHING ]
♪ Adventure is a sad thing ♪
♪ When you're all alone ♪
♪ Danger isn't dangerous ♪
♪ Since you left home ♪
♪ No ♪
[ NEIGHING ]
♪ Try to fight it ♪
♪ Try to hide it ♪
♪ But everywhere I go I find that ♪
♪ Adventure is sad thing ♪
♪ Without you ♪
[ WHISTLING ]
[ NEIGHING ]
[ WHISTLING CONTINUES ]
K'nuckles: [ PANTING ]
Flapjack!
Flap!
♪ A sad thing without you ♪
K'nuckles: [ SOBBING ]
[ DISTANT LAUGHTER ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
Flapjack: Whoo!
Oh!
So...Flapjack,
we've been spending a lot of time together lately.
Flapjack: Yeah!
[ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ]
Yeah, and it's been great.
And, well, there's something I want to ask you.
Will you...set sail with me?
Flapjack: Yes.
K'nuckles: No!
[ SOBBING ]
Flapjack: "Yes" is what I would say...
K'nuckles: Huh?
Flapjack: ...if I wanted to go with you.
I can't leave Bubbie and K'nuckles.
Adventuring with you has been a lot of fun,
but I belong here in Stormalong...for now.
I...I understand.
But, Flapjack, do you think we could still be --
[ DOOR SLAMS ]
Flapjack?
Flapjack: [ GIGGLES ]
K'nuckie!
K'nuckles: [ LAUGHS ]
Flapjack: What are you doing
in this costume?
K'nuckles: Ah, nothing.
Where's captain hairdo?
I thought you guys were having a good time together.
Flapjack: His adventures always went well.
And, well, they weren't very much fun.
[ LAUGHS ]
What fun's that?
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
K'nuckles: Come on, let's go to the Candy Barrel
and tell everyone I'm pregnant
so we can cut in line!
[ LAUGHS ]
Flapjack: I don't know.
You look skinny.
Have you been working out?
[ DISTANT LAUGHTER ]
Flapjack: [ LAUGHING ]
K'nuckles: Oh, you have some rainbow on ya.
[ TWINKLE! ]
Ooh, now it's on me!
Flapjack: [ LAUGHS ]
Look! It's swans!
And where there's swans,
there's happy songs!
K'nuckles: I want to go there!
[ BOTH LAUGH ]
♪ La la la la la ♪
♪ La la la la la la la ♪
K'nuckles: ♪ La la la ♪
♪ La la la la ♪
♪ La la la ♪
Flapjack: Use your inside voice.
K'nuckles: Oopsies!
♪ La la la ♪
♪ la la la la la ♪
[ RUMBLING ]
Flapjack: It's the moody manticore
that wants to destroy our happiness on Happy Island!
[ ROARS ]
K'nuckles: Don't let him have
my happiness, Flappy!
Flapjack: Don't worry. I'll protect it.
K'nuckles: How?!
Flapjack: With my tickling!
[ TICKLE! TICKLE! TICKLE! ]
[ LAUGHING ]
Thank you, adventurer!
I don't feel moody anymore!
Can I have some more of your
fabulous tickles?
[ TICKLE! TICKLE! TICKLE! ]
Bubbie: And they all lived
happily ever after on
Happy Island.
The end.
Flapjack: Yay!
I love the part where you have
me blow the big bubbles,
but K'nuckles was too scared to get in,
and I told him he was acting
like a baby 'cause he was!
But then he didn't care, and we both started tickling!
[ LAUGHS ]
You told that so good, Bubbie.
[ SNIFFLES ]
What was your favorite part, Cap'n?
K'nuckles: I hate bedtime fables.
Bubbie: They're not fables.
They're succulent stories that
whisk you away to magical places.
K'nuckles: Well, they're not so magical to me!
You always make Flap the hero!
And I always sound like a big baby!
Bubbie: Really? I never noticed.
K'nuckles: And what's with the happy endings all the time?
That one had the worst happy ending ever.
I mean, what?
We defeated a venomous manticore
with -- with ticklers?
That would never happen!
Bubbie: Fine.
Okay, here's one with an unhappy ending.
Once upon a time, there was a lonely skiff
adrift at sea in a storm.
Flapjack: Close your eyes, Cap'n.
It feels more real that way.
K'nuckles: Ohh.
[ HARP PLAYS ]
Flapjack: Okay, Bubbie, we're here. Now what?
K'nuckles: yeah! This doesn't seem too stormy!
Bubbie: There were 5-foot waves.
K'nuckles: Eh.
Bubbie: 10-foot waves?
Flapjack: Whoa!
K'nuckles: Eh.
Bubbie: 100-foot waves!
K'nuckles: Now we're talking!
Bubbie: And the sails were...
tattered!
K'nuckles: Tattered?
Bubbie: On fire!
K'nuckles: Yeah!
Flapjack: Oh, my goodness!
K'nuckles: I like where this is going!
Flapjack: Then what happened?
Bubbie: Uh...uh...
K'nuckles: Bring her home, Bubbie!
Bubbie: A-a-and then...
Flapjack uses his ticklers!
K'nuckles: What?!
Flapjack: Tickling!
Yippee!
[ LAUGHS ]
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
Flapjack: Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Whoopee!
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
Bunnies!
[ GIGGLING ]
K'nuckles: You're ruining this, kid!
Bubbie: I guess I can't tell stories with unhappy endings.
K'nuckles: Whatever! I'm leaving!
Flapjack: Wait. Where are you going?
K'nuckles: To the opposite of here!
Come on!
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
I used to come here as a kid,
listen to stories about life,
real life.
No bunnies or rainbows,
I'll tell ya that much.
Gather round.
And shut your eyes!
I don't want any of you looking at me
while I'm telling stories!
This be the worst thing to ever happen to me.
It was 40 years ago tonight.
I was on a wrecking ship in the sea of teeth.
My accommodations were economy class.
You've been at sea for nearly eight months.
You're out of food...and water.
Aah! Aah!
Your master was sick
with the scurvy, so weak
he could barely lift your whip.
Come on, you guys, row!
And then things got bad.
[ CRASH! ]
We bumped into a sea monster.
[ HOWLING ]
He grabbed our ship
and lifted it out of the water.
[ ROARS ]
It was a horrific sight!
I think you know what happened next.
Use the ticklers!
[ TICKLE! TICKLE! TICKLE! ]
[ LAUGHING ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ LAUGHING INTENSIFIES ]
K'nuckles: How was that the worst thing
that ever happened you ya?!
'Cause my oar broke?
K'nuckles: Come on, Flap!
That place has changed.
Where else can we go to get an unhappy ending?
Flapjack: How about Dr. Barber's?
K'nuckles: Yeah, people are always
leaving that place crying.
[ RATTLE! ]
Hmm. Hmm.
[ BELL RINGS ]
Ah, customers.
What can I do for you?
Flapjack: Do you have any stories?
Surgery?
Flapjack: No, just stories.
K'nuckles: Yeah, one with an unhappy ending.
Hmm.
Ah!
So, there's these two guys --
K'nuckles -- K'nupples --
K'napples and Jackflap.
And they think they want
a story.
But what they really want
is surgery.
They drink some of Dr. Barber's tea
and fall asleep.
And when they wake up...
surgery!
Woof! Woof!
Would you like some tea?
K'nuckles: I wanted an unhappy ending,
not a creepshow.
I heard you boys were looking
for unhappy endings.
K'nuckles: Yeah, do you got some?
[ HARP PLAYS ]
No, my life's awesome.
But why don't you try the Candy Barrel?
Hmm.
So, stories with unhappy endings, huh?
Sorry, fellas.
All my stories are...
[ LAUGHS MANIACALLY ]
[ SIGHS ]
...funny.
Candy wife, do you got any?
Yeah, tell 'em that one!
Don't forget about the part with the fish.
She always leaves out the fish.
The ending to the story is the best part.
K'nuckles: Because it's unhappy?
No, because it ends where it started.
You see, it's a cyclical ending.
K'nuckles: [ GROWLS ]
That's not really an ending.
It's more of a tagline.
K'nuckles: [ GROWLS ]
That's the best ironic ending ever!
Nice poetic ending.
I know a pyrrhic ending when I hear one!
I love first-person endings.
That ending makes me blush!
K'nuckles: Aah!
Aah! Why?!
Flapjack: Cap'n! Cap'n!
K'nuckles: Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one
who appreciates sadness.
I just want an unhappy story, Flappy.
Flapjack: [ GASPS ]
You should tell it, Cap'n.
- K'nuckles: Me?! - Flapjack: Yeah,
you're the unhappiest guy I know.
K'nuckles: Yeah, I'm the unhappiest guy I know, too.
Flapjack: So then do it.
K'nuckles: You really think I'm up to it?
Flapjack: Mm-hmm.
K'nuckles: All right, I'm doing it!
But first...
[ GLUG! GLUG! GLUG! GLUG! ]
[ WARBLE! ]
[ WHISTLE! ]
Close your eyes!
Once, there was --
Flapjack: You're coming, too, right?
K'nuckles: Oh, right, of course.
Once, there was...
where's the unhappiness?
Flapjack: You have to make it up.
K'nuckles: Oh, uh...
it was dark.
[ CRICKETS CHIRPING ]
We're in a field!
There's storm clouds and trees!
Dead trees!
How am I doing?
Flapjack: It's pretty unhappy!
[ LAUGHS ]
K'nuckles: Then why are you laughing?
Forget the fields!
We're in a...
cemetery...
and surrounded by the howling of dogs...
and living skeleton warriors from death island!
And they're clawing from their graves!
[ SCREECHING ]
K'nuckles: Whoo! Now we're talking.
And there's a cyclops...
and a giant squid!
Whoa, watch it there, buddy.
That was a little too close.
Hey!
[ GROWLING ]
Flapjack: Cap'n!
K'nuckles: Flap?
[ SCREECHING ]
K'nuckles: Run!
[ SCREECHING ]
Flapjack: What do we do, Cap'n?
K'nuckles: Let's end this story!
And they lived unhappily ever after!
[ SCREECHING AND HOWLING ]
And they lived unhappily ever after!
[ SCREECHING AND HOWLING ]
I hate to say it, but I could
sure use one of them happy endings!
Flapjack: I got an idea.
Ticklers!
K'nuckles: We're dead.
[ TICKLE! TICKLE! TICKLE! ]
Flapjack: [ WHIMPERS ]
I need more ticklers, Cap'n!
[ SCREECHING ]
K'nuckles: My ticklers are busy!
You can borrow mine!
Flapjack: Manticore!
[ TICKLE! TICKLE! TICKLE! ]
[ LAUGHS ]
[ POP! ]
[ LAUGHS ]
[ POP! ]
[ LAUGHS ]
[ POP! ]
[ LAUGHS ]
Flapjack: [ LAUGHS ]
[ POP! ]
[ LAUGHS ]
[ POP! ]
[ TRUMPET PLAYS ]
[ SCREECHING ]
K'nuckles: Aah!
[ LAUGHS ]
[ POP! ]
[ LAUGHTER ]
[ ROARS ]
[ TICKLE! TICKLE! TICKLE! ]
[ GIGGLES ]
[ TWINKLE! ]
Flapjack: Thank you, manticore.
K'nuckles: How did you know we were here?
She told me.
Flapjack: Bubbie!
K'nuckles: I'm so glad to see you.
I scared myself.
[ SLURP! ]
Bubbie: And he lived
unhappily ever after.
The end.
K'nuckles: ♪ Adventure is a sad thing ♪
♪ When you're all alone ♪
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
♪ Danger isn't dangerous ♪
♪ Since you left home ♪
♪ No, no ♪
♪ Adventuring's a sad thing ♪
♪ Without you ♪
Flapjack: Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay!